Wedding Crashers2005

Jeremy:
(with sleeping bag) Happy birthday. Can't let a little pissing and moaning break tradition.

John:
Alright, it's today.

Jeremy:
See you've been getting into a little light reading.

John:
It's not mine, I bought that for a friend.

Jeremy:
Yeah. So how ya been?

John:
Great, really spectacular.

Jeremy:
Well good. What have you been up to?

John:
Ya, you know, this and that. Crashing weddings.

Jeremy:
Alone?

John:
No, not alone.

Jeremy:
Well, who have you been crashing with then?

John:
Chazz.

Jeremy:
Chazz?

John:
Chazz.

Jeremy:
John, you don't even know Chazz. Don't st--

John:
Yes, I do. He's a great guy. We've been having a ball together.

Jeremy:
Alright look. I wanted to come by here and, and tell you I really feel bad about everything that's happened between us. Your friendship means a lot to me. I miss seeing ya.

John:
I know, I--look I'm, I'm happy for you. I'm glad you found someone.

Jeremy:
I can't tell you how glad it makes me to hear you say that man. Get on in here, let the big bear get his paws on ya (hugs him). You know I love you. It's good to see you.

John:
It's good to see you.

Jeremy:
Are you sure you've been okay, this does not look like a guy who's been okay.

John:
Ahh, I know. Looks like a pig sty.

Jeremy:
Like a mosh pit in here. Listen, I'm getting married.

John:
Get out.

Jeremy:
What? You just sat there and said you were happy for me that I'm--

John:
I'm hanging by a thread. I'm reading "don't kill myself" books.

Jeremy:
You said that the book wasn't your's.

John:
Don't worry about the book. It isn't mine, but I glanced at it.

Jeremy:
John, you've been my friend for 16 years. I'm getting married. I need you there to be my best man.

John:
Kindly leave!

Jeremy:
I'm trying--

John:
Kindly leave.

Jeremy:
Mean a lot to me if you came.

John:
Oh, I bet it would! Hillbilly!

Jeremy:
What?!

John:
White trash!

Jeremy:
What are you talking about?

John:
Out. Out.

Jeremy:
You better get your ass to that wedding.