Black Books2000

[Fran's landlord is in his office, eating. Bernard walks in]

Bernard:
Not so fast. I represent Fran Katzenjammer from room 2. She's my client, and I'm a hotshot lawyer like you would've seen on... television.

Landlord:
So what's the problem, exactly?

Bernard:
My client's room is smaller. And as you know, it is illegal to sell space under the European Legislation act, which happens... in a court.

Landlord:
Her room's the same as it's always been. I can give you the measurements if you want?

Bernard:
Don't evade the question.

Landlord:
Eh?

Bernard:
Just answer the question!

Landlord:
What question?

Bernard:
Huh? Oh, right, sorry. Um... where were you when the rooms were measured?

Landlord:
Oh, I was...

Bernard:
Ahahahaha! Ah, so if that's the case, then where was the room?

Landlord:
2B has always been there, you can see it for yourself.

Bernard:
You're damn right I will, before I send this whole building downtown to the boys in the lab. I'm confiscating these as evidence...

[he picks up a packet of buns]

Bernard:
And I'm issuing you with a decree of sub... dew... dee. Subjudy! You are under legal subjudy to stay in that chair until such time as, erm... until Simon says stand up!