Cheers1982

Norm Peterson:
[reading a sleazy tabloid] Geez, Cliff, listen to this. "Scientists Discover Wild Parrot Who Claims to Be Elvis".

Cliff Clavin:
So?

Norm Peterson:
So? I mean, this one wins the "Too Stupid For Even You Cliff" award.

Dr. Frasier Crane:
[exasperated] Oh, really. Must you two wallow in this sensationalistic tripe? I mean, it pains me no end to see America's wits dulled and their morals abrogated by this opiate to the asses.

Norm Peterson:
Well, check this out, Cliffy. "I was Sigmund Freud's Love Child".

Dr. Frasier Crane:
[totally excited] No?

[Frasier runs back to Norm and grabs the tabloid paper and tries to find the story]

Dr. Frasier Crane:
I've heard rumors they betrayed Martha with his sister-in-law, but I never dreamed there'd be progeny.

[reads further. can't find the story. learns he's been had]

Dr. Frasier Crane:
You rapscallions.