Garth Marenghi's Darkplace2004

Thornton Reed:
What do you suggest, Dag?

Dr. Rick Dagless:
Well, we can start by burning what's left of the body.

Dr Lucien Sanchez:
Get lost!

Thornton Reed:
Cool it, Sanchez, or you'll get a knuckle supper! Look, Dagless, you're an excellent doctor, but you're also a live-wire maverick, who, when he's not bucking the system is biting the hand that feeds, which in your case is this hand. Now I'm not about to tell the immediate family of the deceased that we're going to have to burn what remains of his body in order to close the portal to another dimension. I just won't do it! This hospital's got a reputation which I intend to keep. I've yet to see any demons on the wards, and I'm particularly observant. So go back to your lab and make me a pill that will cure madness, or I'll kick your ass so hard, you'll be able to build a pool in the footprint! Understood?

Dr. Rick Dagless:
As crystal. But if the gates of Hell *do* reopen, don't say I didn't specifically warn you, because I just have, and that means you'll be lying.