Gilmore Girls2000

[Emily and Richard have split up]

Emily:
At some point you have to face facts, and the facts are, he's moved on. And therefore I should move on also.

Lorelai:
Absolutely. MoveOn.org.

Emily:
[pause] I think it's time for me to date.

Lorelai:
[chokes on her drink] Oh, my God.

Emily:
I want to go on a date.

Lorelai:
With - a *man*?

Emily:
No, a weasel. Of course, a man!

Lorelai:
I'm not hearing this.

Emily:
Well, why shouldn't I date? I'm still a viable commodity.

Lorelai:
I need a paper towel and a Valium, please.

Emily:
There are plenty of men at the club who, in the past, have made their interest in me known, I just need to figure out how to reciprocate their feelings. You have a lot of experience with men. How do you let them know that you're available?

Lorelai:
Well, one of those bench ads usually does the trick.

Emily:
Lorelai, stop it. I need help here. It's been years since I did this, and I don't remember the proper procedure! Now take me through this step-by-step. You see a man, you walk up to him and you say...

Lorelai:
...Hello.

Emily:
Is that too forward?

Lorelai:
No, it's the appropriate way to indicate you're open to a social engagement. Unless, however, you are approaching a weasel. Then I believe the proper signal is just to offer him your hindquarters. [Emily glares]