Gilmore Girls2000

Dr. Shapiro:
You were arrested with your boyfriend?

Rory:
Yes, I was.

Dr. Shapiro:
Tell me about that.

Rory:
About what? He was my boyfriend then and now he's not.

Dr. Shapiro:
He's not?

Rory:
No, he's not, we broke up. No, oh no, I'm sorry, HE broke up, I thought that we were just taking some time, but apparently, I'm a moron!

Dr. Shapiro:
This is Logan?

Rory:
What you have his name too? Super! Do you also have the picture of him hijacking me in my hallway earlier today?

Dr. Shapiro:
I'm sorry, what?

Rory:
I mean, how fair is that? He's gone, and then he shows up out of the blue, 'You cant live here, this place is a dump, and by the way, I love you!' I love you? Is he serious?

Dr. Shapiro:
I don't know.

Rory:
Nothing, for weeks! And then he just decides that he loves me?

[freaking out]

Rory:
So what happens now? I get another Birkin bag? And how long until he doesn't love me again, huh? I stole a boat with him! I never stole a boat with Dean!

Dr. Shapiro:
Who's Dean?

Rory:
My married ex-boyfriend who I lost my virginity to!

Dr. Shapiro:
Wow.

Rory:
Yeah, I'm a treat! I don't know what I'm gonna do, I don't think I can take running into him every day in the halls, and in the paper and the coffee cart... Oh my god! I'm gonna have to quit drinking coffee! And I love coffee!

[sobbing]

Rory:
I really love coffee!