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[Brendon and Coach McGuirk are watching the popular new assistant coach, Drew, run the kids' soccer practice]

Coach McGuirk:
Hey Brendon, how come the team never carried me off the field?

Brendon:
We tried, but you were too big.

Coach McGuirk:
Excuse me?

Brendon:
I mean, uhh... too drunk?

Coach McGuirk:
Yes. Yes I was. But I tell you something Brendon, I am every day, that doesn't mean don't carry me off the field.

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