How I Met Your Mother2005

[In MacLaren's Bar, Barney is hitting on Claudia, whose fiance just broke up with her]

Barney:
Claudia, isn't it weird that we should... run into each other like this? Two souls, of equal levels of attractiveness, both fitting together like two pieces of a very... attractive puzzle.

Lily:
[running up to their booth and grabbing Barney's ear] Oh, Hell no!

Barney:
[being dragged by ear away from Claudia] ow, ow, ow, ow!

Lily:
[angrily] Claudia is getting married tomorrow. And so help me God, if I catch you even so much as breathing the same air as her, I will take those peanuts you're trying to pass off as testicles, and I will squeeze them so hard your eyes pop out, and then I'll feed them to you like grapes!

Barney:
Wait! My eyes, or my testicles?

Lily:
[momentarily confused, then:] One of each!