I'm Alan Partridge1997

Lynn Benfield:
Do you want to hear the good news or the bad news?

Alan Partridge:
The good news.

Lynn Benfield:
Well, Rawlinson's say you can have another fifty of the shop-soiled chocolate oranges if you plug them again tomorrow.

Alan Partridge:
Excellent. And the bad news?

Lynn Benfield:
The accountants say that since you've definitely not got a second series at the BBC you're going to have to sack everyone at Pear Tree Productions and close the office down. Otherwise they're going to declare you bankrupt on Friday.

Alan Partridge:
Right. Still, good news about the chocolate oranges.

Lynn Benfield:
Now, Alan, you're going to have to trade down your Rover 800 for a smaller car.

Alan Partridge:
Go on.

Lynn Benfield:
I picked up these brochures for the new Metro. It's a lovely car. And if you do...

Alan Partridge:
[Interrupting] Lynn, I'm not driving a Mini-Metro.

Lynn Benfield:
But you do have to make substantial savings.

Alan Partridge:
Lynn, I am not driving a Mini Metro.

Lynn Benfield:
But if you do, you can keep Pear Tree Productions going with a skeleton staff of two, and...

Alan Partridge:
There's no point finishing the sentence, Lynn, because I am not driving a Mini-Metro.

Lynn Benfield:
But if you...

Alan Partridge:
Lynn! I'll just speak over you. [Lynn tries to speak] No! Go on, try and finish the sentence and see what I do. Go on. [They both talk together]

Lynn Benfield:
With a skeleton staff of two...

Alan Partridge:
I'm not driving a Mini-Metro, I'm not driving a Mini-Metro, I'm not driving a Mini-Metro.

Lynn Benfield:
No, no, no, it's different. It's called a Rover Metro now.

Alan Partridge:
They've rebadged it, you fool!

Lynn Benfield:
Well, Alan, if you want a Rover 200 you're going to have to sack everyone at Pear Tree Productions.

Alan Partridge:
Fine.

Lynn Benfield:
Including Jill.

Alan Partridge:
Jill. Lovely Jill. She's my favourite. But fine, I'll sack her.