Monty Python's Flying Circus1969

Storyteller:
Hello, children. Hello. Here is this morning's story. Are you ready? Then we'll begin.

[He opens the book and begins reading]

Storyteller:
"One day, Ricky the magic pixie went to visit Daisy Bumble in her tumble-down cottage. He found her in the bedroom. Roughly, he grabbed her heavy shoulders, pulling her down onto the bed and ripping off her..."

[He is understandably shocked. He flips past two pages of the book, then resumes reading]

Storyteller:
"Old Nick the sea captain was a rough, tough, jolly sort of fellow. He loved the life of the sea, and he loved to hang out down by the pier, where the men dressed as ladies..."

[He is again shocked. He flips past two more pages, slower than before. He is nudged by a stick from offstage, and resumes reading]

Storyteller:
"Rumpletweezer ran the dinky-tinky shop in the foot of the magic oak tree by the wobbly dum-dum bush in the shade of the magic glade down in Dingly Dell. Here he sold contraceptives and..."

[Shocked, he begins flipping through the book without bothering to read it]

Storyteller:
Discipline... naked... with a melon?