Parks and Recreation2009

Ann Perkins:
Leslie wishes she could be here herself to give you these presents, but she's suspended. Oh, and also, she said they're not from her, they're from Santa Claus.

Andy Dwyer:
Can I go first? [to camera; shows his framed gold record] Mouserat: Certified gold! Over 100 copies sold in Pawnee! I need a picture of me holding this so I can frame it.

Donna Meagle:
Personalized leopard-printed robe, pink feather cuffs, and on the back in rhinestones, [turns around] "You Can Get It!"

Tom Haverford:
"I know you're sad you couldn't get tickets to the Watch the Throne tour, so I got you a watch and a tiny throne instead." And check it out, she even took out the dumb clock part and put this in: [shows text that says... ] "Baller Time!"

April Ludgate:
[Holds up painting of her and the Black Eyed Peas' decapitated heads, with a shirtless Andy nearby] These are the Black Eyed Peas, and I finally killed them. It's a Christmas miracle.

Ron Swanson:
Every year, I give Leslie the same present I give everyone: a crisp 20 dollar bill. And every year, she gets me something thoughtful and personal. It makes me furious. This year, she outdid herself. [Presses a clicker that closes both of his office doors at once] She had it installed over the weekend. It's so... [starts crying] it's so beautiful.