Pets2001

JP:
[Looking over a miniature Nativity scene] "We are three wise men and we bring you gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh. We have absolutely no idea what 'myrrh' is, but we thought you'd like some anyway."

Davina:
What the f*** are you doing?

JP:
I'm re-enacting the moment when the Three Wise Men meet the little baby Jesus.

Davina:
Well, could you tell them to keep the noise down, please? I have a headache.

JP:
At least I'm doing something that conjures up the spirit of Christmas, what are you doing?

Davina:
What does it look like I'm doing?

JP:
I'm not sure... But it's giving me a very warm feeling inside...

Davina:
Tosser.

JP:
I'd appreciate it if you didn't swear in front of the Virgin Mary.

Davina:
And I'd appreciate it if you didn't exist!

JP:
So... Cleaning yourself? It must take a lot of practice to do it properly. You need to be quite supple. So... You probably have to work out. Do you think you could teach me how to do it?

Davina:
Why are you so weird?