Scrubs2001

Elliot:
Dr. Cox, this is the most painful thing I've ever done and I was a cutter for a week in high school. My shop teacher thought scars were sexy, but that's a whole other story. The point is, your advice really worked with Jake and I'd really appreciate it if you would give me some more help.

Dr. Cox:
Oh, no problem Barbie, let me just finish writing this prescription and you'll be all squared away.

[hands Elliot the prescription]

Elliot:
This is a prescription for 'no'.

Dr. Cox:
Correctomundo. To be taken with food every Saturday night while you're eating alone.

Elliot:
I don't think you understand the severity of the situation here. I am dangerously close to giving up men all together!

Dr. Cox:
Then on behalf of men everywhere-and I do mean everywhere

[makes a circle with his hands]

Dr. Cox:
-including the ones in the little mud huts, let me be the first to say thanks and yalleluah!

Carla:
Elliot, do you see the problem with trying to appeal to it's human side?

Elliot:
He doesn't have one.

Carla:
Exactly. But what does he have?

Elliot:
[grudgingly] A shaped chest, a closet full of tiny t-shirts, and the eyes of a madman.

Dr. Cox:
Ohhhhhh! I'm sorry, the correct answer she was looking for is a giant ego.

[nodding]

Dr. Cox:
I have a giant ego!

Elliot:
Dammit! I knew that.

Carla:
Can you just appeal to it so I can go get something to eat?

Elliot:
You're... amazing.

Dr. Cox:
And I'm in!

Elliot:
[makes a happy noise]