Seinfeld1989

J. Peterman:
Elaine, do you have a moment? It's about your lover.

Elaine Benes:
[Faking a broken heart] Oh yes. I know all about his little performance in the break room.

Elaine Benes:
Elaine, who among us hasn't snuck into the break room to nibble on a love newton?

Elaine Benes:
Love newton?

J. Peterman:
I'm afraid the problem with Zach is more serious. He's back on the horse, Elaine. Smack. White palace. The Chinaman's nightcap.

Elaine Benes:
An addict?... Well, it just keeps getting better!

J. Peterman:
And, in a tiny way, I almost feel responsible. I'm the one who sent him to Thailand in search of low-cost whistles, filled his head with pseudoerotic tales of my own Opium excursions... plus, I gave him some phone numbers of places he could score near the hotel.

Elaine Benes:
Look, uh, Mr. Peterman, the fact is that I was planning on breaking up with Zach anyway. He was cheating on me!

J. Peterman:
Damn it, Elaine. That wasn't Zach. That was the yam-yam. Now, he is going cold turkey... And you will be at his side.

Elaine Benes:
Oh. Well, you know, I had planned to uh...

J. Peterman:
[Cutting her off] No buts, Elaine. Or I will strip you of your 'associate' status.

[Peterman goes to leave]

J. Peterman:
Oh, P.S., the first twenty-four hours are the worst... Beeetter bring a poncho.