The Middle2009

Frankie Heck:
Brick found the book!

Brick Heck:
Oh, not the book. I found these coupons for half-off at The Pie House.

Frankie Heck:
Brick, look at my face. Do you have any sense of how angry I am right now?

Brick Heck:
Nothing pie wouldn't fix.

Frankie Heck:
I will kill you.

Sue Heck:
Okay, uh, no offense, Mom, but Orson is losing its number one Christian role model, and all you can think of is a dumb book.

Frankie Heck:
You have a dad, too. Why don't you tell him about any of this stuff? It wouldn't kill him to listen every once in awhile. Mike.

Mike Heck:
Hey! I listen plenty. But there's only so many hours in a day, and I got to spend most of them at work so I can pay off things like overdue library books. Brick.

Brick Heck:
It's not my fault I can't find the book. I live with the messiest person ever. Axl.

Axl Heck:
Hey, if I'm messy, it's because I'm crammed into half a room instead of having my own room in a mansion that we can't afford 'cause they put all our money into Sue's mouth!

Sue Heck:
Oh! And why do you think I need braces, Axl? It is because you drank all the milk that I was supposed to get to make my teeth strong and healthy. I never got one sip. You just drained Mom dry. That is why I have uncorrectable teeth and Brick is a foot shorter than he should be.

Axl Heck:
No! No! No! D-D-Don't blame that on me. He's short 'cause he's hunched over a book all the time. That's why all his growth spurts are this way. [bends horizontally] He keeps going, he's gonna be an "O".

Brick Heck:
Maybe I read all time 'cause Dad never took an interest in me. He's too busy coddling the milk hoarder.