You Can't Do That on Television

You Can't Do That on Television1979

Genre: Comedy
You Can't Do That on Television is a Canadian sketch comedy television series that first aired locally in 1979 before airing in the United States in 1981. It featured preteen and teenage actors in a sketch comedy format similar to that of American s… more »



Alasdair Gillis:
Why's the firing squad so restless today?

El Capitano:
Ah, I'll tell you, kid. They're restless because they are sick and tired of shooting at little kids like you. They want to shoot something bigger. In fact, they all have a secret ambition to shoot at El Presidente, yeah?

Alasdair Gillis:
Hey, that IS ambitious.

El Capitano:
Yeah, sure.

Alasdair Gillis:
You think they'll ever get the chance?

El Capitano:
I don't think so. No. Where are they going to get the experience shooting adults?

Alasdair Gillis:
What... Do they WANT some practice?

El Capitano:
Of COURSE they want practice, but where are they going to find someone BIG?

Alasdair Gillis:
YOU! You can be the target.

El Capitano:
Me? Well, that's not a bad idea, but, uh, who is going to be El Capitano?

Alasdair Gillis:
Hey, I can be the capitano.

El Capitano:
You?

Alasdair Gillis:
Yeah. It's always been my secret ambition to be a capitano.

El Capitano:
Really?

Alasdair Gillis:
Yeah. They're so dashing, and daring, and romantically handsome.

El Capitano:
[giggling from the flattery] Y-you really think so?

Alasdair Gillis:
Yeah, and this could be my one chance.

El Capitano:
Yes, and, you know, you're right because it's the one chance for the firing squad, the amigos, to shoot someone big instead of all you stupid little kids. We change places.

Alasdair Gillis:
Okay.

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    "You Can't Do That on Television Quotes." Quotes.net. STANDS4 LLC, 2025. Web. 9 Jan. 2025. <https://www.quotes.net/mquote/957088>.

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