A Truthful Liar

A Truthful Liar1924



Agatha Doolittle:
[in a partly-fake fluttery huff after inspecting the thick wad of bills - - Will's winnings from the poker games with the King - - that Will hands to her] You promised me you wouldn't gamble!

Ambassador Alfalfa Doolittle:
You don't know the King - - he was such a lousy poker-player that I knew I could win every game. So I wasn't gamblin'; I was just collectin'.

Agatha Doolittle:
[still trying to maintain her charade of an upset and disapproving attitude, although we notice that she DOES accept the wad of bills willingly enough, and tuck them away into her pocket! :P ]

Mary Doolittle:
[in a casual way that shows that SHE doesn't care if her papa gambled or not... she merely wonders if Mom will be the only one to receive a gift collected during Will's travels] Didn't you bring anything for me, Daddy?

Ambassador Alfalfa Doolittle:
[takes out the fancy little crown that he won from the King - - probably the King gave it to Will at the end of their last poker game, after the King ran out of whatever pocket cash he'd had with him - - and places it gently on his daughter's smiling head]

Mary Doolittle:
[smiles gratefully, then winks coquettishly and holds up her hand the way the Queen did when Will had greeted her, as was shown earlier in his story]

Ambassador Alfalfa Doolittle:
[smiles in indulging amusement, then tenderly lifts his daughter's hand and kisses the back of it]

Ambassador Alfalfa Doolittle:
[Fade-out; switching back to the present with Will reciting his adventures to the crowd of townspeople] So aside from teaching the King to play craps, I guess that's about it.

Young boy in crowd:
[in a bold taunting tone] Razzberries! You win the silk-lined shotgun! [his sister hurriendly shushes him in an attempt to get him to "remain civil and polite to their honored returning hero", although the other townspeople also begin disgustedly waving off Will's story as being hogwash]

Ambassador Alfalfa Doolittle:
[draws himself up stiffly in an exaggerated attitude of offended defensiveness] I hope a BUILDING FALLS IN ON ME if every word I've spoken isn't the truth!

Ambassador Alfalfa Doolittle:
[scene switches to the wall of a large factory building next to him; the huge brick chimney that's built onto the outside pops loose from the wall and topples over, showering Will with bricks. The townspeople stand around and cooly survey the scene of chaos with their arms folded or on their hips, staring at Will with a sarcastic "WELL, PART OF A BUILDING **DID** FALL ON YOU - - WHAT HAVE YOU TO SAY **NOW** ABOUT THE ACCURACY OF YOUR STORIES?" expression. Will sits up a little shakily and groggily after having been deluged with all the bricks, coated white with mortar dust, and grins in amused humiliation] Well - - mebbe I did stretch it a little...

Ambassador Alfalfa Doolittle:
[the townspeople laugh, and then as the picture fades out, they good-naturedly begin helping clear away the scattered bricks from around Will]

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