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Robin Williams: Some things you may want to stay away from while drinking heavily. Ebay, not a good idea. Ebay and alcoholism, perfect storm of addiction. You'll find yourself up to your ass in George Foreman grills and Sham Wows.[laughter]Robin Williams: Another thing you don't want to do while really drunk is get a tattoo. I did. I got really loaded, I got a tattoo in Mandarin that says "happiness and laughter" right here. I think it says that. I've never had a Chinese person that close to my balls going[in exaggerated Chinese]Robin Williams: "That's what it says."[laughter]Robin Williams: But I had a friend get really f***ed up, and he got a tattoo in Mandarin that's supposed to say "golden warrior", and a Chinese friend said[in exaggerated Chinese again]Robin Williams: "No, it says 'ass monkey'."[laughter]Robin Williams: Then the idiot went out and got drunk again, and got a tattoo in Hindu that was supposed to say "dawn of enlightenment." And a Hindu friend said[in exaggerated Hindu]Robin Williams: "No, it says 'deliveries on Tuesday'."[laughter]Robin Williams: So he is now the ass monkey who delivers on Tuesday for the rest of his life.[laughter]

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