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[Mike tries to join the Directors' Union:]Mike: Hello, hi.Directors' Union Clerk: Can I help you?Mike: Yes, how do I join the Directors' Union?Directors' Union Clerk: You need to bring in a copy of the deal memo by your studio producer before you can pay your initiation fee and be cleared by Union Council, thank you...Mike: Uh, excuse me, what is the initiation fee?Directors' Union Clerk: Seven thousand dollars, with a hundred dollar application fee, two hundred dollars every quarter, and ten percent of your salary.Mike: Uhhh, seven thousand dollars, what is that for?Directors' Union Clerk: That's the amount you pay to get into our union.Mike: What is it, like Social Security? I get it back when I retire?Directors' Union Clerk: Absolutely not! What is your classification?Mike: Uh, well, I'm directing special effects with a small crew.Directors' Union Clerk: Well, then you must have an Assistant Director, a Second AD, and a UPM, all signed with the DUA.Mike: All I'm directing is animation!Directors' Union Clerk: Well then discuss that with the Animators' Union.

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