Marcus Vindictus: There! Seize him!!
Josephus: [grabbing his crotch] Seize this, honkus!
Comicus: [confidentially] NO! Don't ever say that to the Fuzz!
Marcus Vindictus: ARREST HIM! [his guards do so] Do you know the punishment for a slave who strikes a Roman citizen? [the crowd starts shouting and raising hands] OK, you...You had your hand up first.
Onlooker #1: Death by torture!
Marcus Vindictus: [TV edit] Be more specific, please.
Onlooker #1: [TV edit, thinking fast] ...You get drawn and quartered?
Marcus Vindictus: [TV edit] I don't think that's been invented yet. Who's got the encyclopedia? [a lieutenant brings him a "World Scroll", which MV skims] ...Ah, here it is...No, that one doesn't come along until the Dark Ages. Good guess, though. How about you?
Onlooker #2: Crucifixion!
Marcus Vindictus: Wrong; that's the penalty for high treason! Still, very good guess. And you?
Onlooker #3: [TV edit] They force-feed you a mess of laxatives and then lock you in an airtight room, so that you choke to death on your own flatulence!
Marcus Vindictus: [TV edit] Wow! Ah, that's not correct, but...Hey, are you writing this down? Who knows, we might have some work for this guy; come on, write it down! [He urgently taps the lieutenant, who proceeds to write it down]
Roman Lieutenant: [TV edit, under his breath] Hm, a gas chamber... [chuckles] That'll never catch on.
Marcus Vindictus: ...Over here?
Onlooker #4: They send you to the lions!
Marcus Vindictus: Right!
Miriam: NO!
Marcus Vindictus: What do you mean, no? He was right! If a slave strikes a citizen, the slave gets sent to the lions!
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