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Omelet (Jimmy Gourd): But soft, 'tis Ophelia. (no response; Omelet repeats with emphasis) But soft! Tis Ophelia! Mr. Lunt: (from off-stage, wearing a pink dress) But I don't wanna do it! It's embarrassing! Arcibald Asparagus: You have to. It's tradition. In Shakespeare's day, all the women roles were played by men. (shoves Lunt out onto the stage) Mr. Lunt: I think we're gonna get letters about this... (in character) 'Tis I, the fair Ophelia.

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