Wagstaff: (enters a biology classroom) Have they started sawing a woman in half yet?
Biology professor: Why, Mr. President, this is indeed an honor! What brings you here?
Wagstaff: A bicycle, but I left it in the hallway. Do you have two empty dunce seats in here? 'Cause I got two empty-headed dunces in the hall. Come in, dunces! (Baravelli and Pinky enter) Here they are- ten cents a dunce. (Baravelli gives the professor an apple, Pinky gives him a watermelon) Now all you need is a bowl of cherries.
Biology teacher: Er- find yourselves a couple of seats. (Pinky and Baravelli sit down, kiss the girls on either side of them, accidentally kiss each other, start a fight, then sit down again) Now, let us go on with our lecture.
Wagstaff: I wish you'd go on without your lecture. (looking down a microscope)
Biology teacher:... What do you think of that slide?
Wagstaff: Well, I think he was safe at second, but it was very close.
Biology teacher: Now, let us examine the circulatory system. Here is the liver.
Wagstaff: What! No bacon! I'd send that back if I were you.
Biology teacher: The liver, if neglected, invariably leads to cirrhosis. Of course, you are all familiar with the symptoms of cirrhosis.
Baravelli: Sure. So roses are red. So violets are blue. So sugar is sweet. So so are you.
Wagstaff: I can't see him, but I bet I know who it is.
Biology teacher: For the protection of the heart, or cardium, Mother Nature has provided a sac, called the pericardium. Any questions?
Baravelli: Yes. When you gonna cut the watermelon open?
Wagstaff: Is this stuff on the level or are you just making it up as you go along? My feet are getting tired from this walk.
Biology teacher: Why, everything I told you can be found in the simplest text book on anatomy. I'm sure my students will bear me out.
Baravelli: (stands up) We'll bear you out!
[The teacher is borne out of the classroom into the corridor, literally, by Pinky and Baravelli, Pinky loudly honking his taxi horn]
Wagstaff: (to the students) Let that be a lesson to all of you: this school was here before you came, and it'll be here before you go. And that goes for you too, ya numbskull! (swats at a skull sitting on the professor's desk)
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