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[in the school office about to get "slippered"] Mr. Dicks: Now, why are you here, Ornshaw? Ornshaw: Because you invited me, sir. Mr. Dicks: And why did I invite you, Ornshaw? Ornshaw: Well, because I couldn't translate the Latin, sir. Mr. Dicks: Why, Ornshaw? Why? Ornshaw: Because it's a bloody silly out-of-date language do you mean, sir? Mr. Dicks: Two was it, Ornshaw... I think we'll make it four... [trying to hold his temper] ...And why do you think it's a... silly out-of-date language, Ornshaw? Ornshaw: Well, because I couldn't speak to a dead Roman even if I knew the bloody lingo, sir!

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