[Jay and Silent Bob are in a van called "The Mystery Machine" with the Mystery Inc. gang as Scooby barks twice]
Jay: Zoinks, yo.
Fred Jones: Now we can finally solve the mystery of the hitchhiking ghouls. Pull off their masks and let's see who they really are!
Velma Dinkley: I don't think they are masks.
Daphne Blake: And I don't think that they're hitchhiking girls either.
Velma Dinkley: GHOULS, you fucking moron, not girls. [Daphne looks offended] But I wish they were hitchhiking girls, sexy hitchhiking girls.
Fred Jones: Let's kick 'em out! We've got a mystery to solve!
Shaggy Rogers: The only mystery here is why we take our cues from a dick in the neckerchief!
Fred Jones: [grabs Shaggy by the shirt] Keep it up, beatnik. I'll feed ya to the fucking dog!
Daphne Blake: [covers her ears] I CAN'T TAKE OFF THIS FIGHTING!
Jay: YO! [the gang calms down] Youse guys need to turn those frowns upside down, and I got just the thing for that... we call it... [holds up a Ziploc bag of cigarettes] DOOBY SNACKS!
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