Dan: Morning, honey.
Tammy: Morning, sweetie.
Dan: So, what's new in the world?
Tammy: Well, crime rate's going up in Chicago.
Dan: See? That's another thing to be grateful for. No crime here. Nothing but peace and quiet. That is temporary.
Tammy: Mm-hmm. Oh, Dan, wild turkeys. Wild turkeys. Dan, stop. Hey. You can't eat that in front of them. Put it down. It could be their mom.
Dan: How do they know it's turkey bacon and not bacon-bacon?
Tammy: [mimics turkey] They have a sixth sense. Put it down. Hey, honey. How'd you sleep?
Tyler: Not good. I had this awful nightmare that my insensitive parents uprooted me from my wonderful home and dumped me in the middle of nowhere.
Tammy: He just misses his friends.
Dan: How can he miss his friends? He spent the whole summer cooped up in his room talking to them online with his computer.
Tammy: He knows the deal, all right? We're here for a year, and then we go back to Chicago. Maybe you should talk to him.
Dan: [scoffs] What for? That'll just irritate him more.
Tammy: Dan, you're his dad. Try.
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