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Uncle Gabby: I decided the worst thing about Captain's Daughter is how boring she is.Drinky Crow: Really?Uncle Gabby: What makes her boredom so specially awful is the way she talks with the intonation of someone saying something really interesting, which forces you to listen, so every moment is excruciating torture. That's the biggest reason I hate her.Drinky Crow: Then why are you marrying her?Uncle Gabby: She'll be legally required to have sex with me. If she doesn't, she can go to jail. Or get the electric chair. [happily sighs] Then I'd be free.

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    Quiz

    Are you a quotes master?

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    "Who steals my purse steals trash; But he that filches from me my good name robs me of that which not enriches him and makes me poor indeed."
    A Julius Caesar
    B Othello
    C Marcus Aurelius
    D lincoln