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[after Daria and Jane pass succesfully the self-esteem class, Mr. O'Neill congratulates them at the school assembly]Mr. Timothy O'Neill: I'd like you to meet two students who have completed our self-esteem course faster than anyone ever before! Please, join me in congratulations as I present these certificates of self-esteem to...[Mr. O'Neill reads the names from a ticket, since he fails to remember faces]Mr. Timothy O'Neill: ...Daria Morgendorffer and Jane Lane.[meager applause]Jane: [shrugs] Oh, what the hell.[Jane and Daria approach Mr. O'Neill and take their certificates. Jane steps up to podium, intending to turn the whole foolish event into a joke]Jane: I just want to say how proud I am today. Knowing that I have self-esteem gives me even more self-esteem.[Jane smirks at Daria, then launches into her act]Jane: [wears sad expression] On the other hand, having all of you know that I had low self-esteem makes me feel... kind of bad... like a big failure or something...[Daria smiles. The audience starts tittering]Jane: I... uh... I want to go home![Jane pretends to burst into tears, and runs off stage. The audience bursts out laughing]Mr. Timothy O'Neill: Daria, wait![Mr. O'Neill runs after Jane. Daria steps up to podium]

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