Ignatius Slake: Question number one: how do you catch a cold?Dick Turpin: Eh, I trap sneezes in a kerchief and use them as bait.Ignatius Slake: That's a good reply. How long is a piece of cheese?Dick Turpin: How long is it where, my lord?Ignatius Slake: Where, what?Dick Turpin: I find mountain cheese lasts much longer than stilton.Ignatius Slake: Careful, Mr. Alexander. How do you cure a ham?Dick Turpin: [laughs nervously] Oh my lord, I think you're trying to trick me. eh, ah, I would cure a ham if he were alive, but alas, poor nose sunday's passed all physic.Ignatius Slake: He has indeed, yes, he has indeed.
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