Dick Turpin1979

Ignatius Slake:
Question number one: how do you catch a cold?

Dick Turpin:
Eh, I trap sneezes in a kerchief and use them as bait.

Ignatius Slake:
That's a good reply. How long is a piece of cheese?

Dick Turpin:
How long is it where, my lord?

Ignatius Slake:
Where, what?

Dick Turpin:
I find mountain cheese lasts much longer than stilton.

Ignatius Slake:
Careful, Mr. Alexander. How do you cure a ham?

Dick Turpin:
[laughs nervously] Oh my lord, I think you're trying to trick me. eh, ah, I would cure a ham if he were alive, but alas, poor nose sunday's passed all physic.

Ignatius Slake:
He has indeed, yes, he has indeed.