Marshall Eriksen: Why in the world would Ted text a girl he barely knows that he sometimes has gay dreams about me?Barney Stinson: Whoa. Slow your roll. You? He's clearly talking about me.Marshall Eriksen: Dude, it's me. I'm his best friend.Barney Stinson: Okay, one: that has never been proven. Two: If anyone were to have gay dreams about one of us, it would be me. I mean, look at me. Now look at you.Marshall Eriksen: Here's the thing, Barney. I'm snuggly. You're not. Who wouldn't want to snuggle up next to this business on a Sunday morning? Wrapped in a comforter, and it's raining outside, And there's muffins warming in the oven. I'm cuddly, bitch. Deal with it.Barney Stinson: I work out every day. If there is one thing we know about Ted, It's that he likes a nice body. This body would rock his world.Marshall Eriksen: Ted and I have a history. I know what he likes. There are things I could do to him that would blow his mind - - Why do we keep trying to have sex with Ted?Barney Stinson: I don't know. It's weird.
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