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Will McKenzie: I need you to do something for me.Simon Cooper: OK, what is it?Will McKenzie: Have a look at my cock.Simon Cooper: [confused] Umm...Will McKenzie: Not in a gay way. It's just that something's gone wrong.Simon Cooper: I think looking at your cock at all is a bit gay.Will McKenzie: Please. I'm serious. All my pubes have fallen out.Simon Cooper: What?Will McKenzie: I was asleep at school, and I must have had a wet dream because it was all sticky...Simon Cooper: You spunked in the common room?Will McKenzie: Yes, but listen. I went home to clean up, and all my pubes came out in the shower.Simon Cooper: [incredulously] You spunked your pants in the common room during the day when there were people around?Will McKenzie: [matter of factly] Yes.Simon Cooper: Then your pubes fell out.Will McKenzie: Yes!Simon Cooper: I think this is way out of my league.

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