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David Horton: Item two: Mindless Vandalism. As you probably know, we have an outbreak of graffiti in the village.Letitia Cropley: Oh, yes, I saw that. I don't think you're a prat, Mr Horton.David Horton: No-one said I was.Owen Newitt: Yes, some bugger's scrawled: "Mr Horton's a total prat" on the Scout Hut wall.David Horton: We also seem to have acquired a village *Puss* Office. You keeping up, Frank?Frank Pickle: Yeah. Horton's a total prat.David Horton: Well, let's just keep an eye out for them, shall we? Especially the little *bastard* who's tampered with the sign for the *Tuck* Shop.

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