Gary the Nerd: [sitting in front of his computer in his room] If I own enough noobs, I can raise my rank in the server from 3 to 1. Hee-hee! Radio DJ: Be our 99th caller right now to be a winner in our Mission: Impossible III contest! Gary the Nerd: Ooh, ooh! [grabs his phone and speed dials the number to the radio station] Radio DJ: [answers phone] Hello! You're our 99th caller! Gary the Nerd: Excellent! Radio DJ: You win your choice of a GameBoy Advance or a date with M:I III star, Scarlett Johansson! Gary the Nerd: [shaking nervously] Can I have both? Radio DJ: No. Gary the Nerd: Do I have to choose right now? Radio DJ: Yes. Gary the Nerd: [makes drawn-out moans as he makes up his mind for several seconds] I guess I choose Scarlett Johansson. [Cuts to the scene to outside food stand. Gary is standing in a white tuxedo as he anxiously waits for Scarlett Johansson's arrival. A limo pulls up to the stand. Cut to Scarlett and her manager inside the limo] Scarlett Johansson: [to her manager] Look, can I just roll down the window and shake his hand? Manager: No, the contest specifies lunch. Scarlett Johansson: [to her dismay] Crap in a hat. [Scarlett and Gary are shown sitting at one of the tables at the stand. Scarlett looks very disinterested as Gary attempts to break the awkward silence between them] Gary the Nerd: So, do you ever play "The Sims"? [spit flies out of Gary's mouth and lands in Scarlett's face, which she wipes off with a napkin] I made a Scarlett Johansson Sim and she lived in my house and sometimes we went in the hot tub together, [Scarlett face-palms out of annoyance] but I forgot to buy a fire extinguisher. So there was a grease fire in the kitchen and Scarlett died. Scarlett Johansson: [in a bored and uninterested tone] Mm-hmm... [Two armed men wearing black from top to bottom suddenly appear out of nowhere to hassle the couple] Burglar 1: Give us all your money! Gary the Nerd: [surprised] Ah! [jumps to his feet] Leave us alone, you hooligans! Hi-yah! [starts doing karate moves in front of the two burglars] Burglar 1: He fights like a tiger! Burglar 2: Let's get out of here! [they flee behind the food stand. Scarlett is awestruck at what she witnessed. Behind the stand, it turns out the burglars are Gary's friends who helped stage the scenario] That was so stellar! Burglar 1: Gary's totally gonna score now! [They attempt to high-five, but Burglar 1 misses and falls forward] Scarlett Johansson: You..You saved me! You're my hero! [Gary lets out a lovesick sigh. A montage begins to play. Scarlett and Gary are skipping hand and hand on the beach together. Then the two are seen playing out a scene in Star Trek. The scene cuts to a Star Trek themed marriage of Gary and Scarlett, with a Klingon acting as the minister] Klingon: Do you take this be'hon to be your be'nal? Gary the Nerd: Hi'lah! [Both Gary and Scarlett kiss after the exchange of vowels. The montage continues with the arrival of their first child as well as the two fighting off a giant spider. The scene jumps to many years later, when Gary is on his deathbed with Scarlett at his side] Gary the Nerd: Scarlett, my love...there's something I must tell you before I die. Scarlett Johansson: What is it, my love? Gary the Nerd: I staged the whole fight on our first date. I won your heart under false pretenses. Scarlett Johansson: [gasps and then lets out a sigh of relief] Oh, thank god! I have something to tell you, too. I'm not really Scarlett Johansson! I was just a professional Scarlett Johansson impersonator! [clears her throat. Her voice changed into a man's voice] My real name is Raymond DeBonatello from Queens, New York. Gary the Nerd: [gasps in shock as he looks at the camera] That explains why Scarlett Johansson had a...giant Johansson! [spasms for a second and dies. The EKG flatlines] Raymond DeBonatello: [sobbing] Go in peace, my angel! [A message appears at the bottom of the screen, reading: "For your Emmy consideration- Robot Chicken"]

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