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Dewey: [on a microphone] Hello, my name is Dewey. The man with the balloon is my father, Hal.Hal: [in a spotlight] Dewey?Dewey: I'm the youngest of four kids, and I always get the short end of everything. I've never had a hot shower or a bed to myself. I'm the third person to wear this underwear. And yet, I've never complained.Hal: Dewey, what is this about?Dewey: Even when my parents decided to have another baby. And they told me they're inducing labor. And they picked a really interesting day to do it. Do you remember what day you picked, Dad?Hal: Dewey?Dewey: [echoing] What day did you pick, Dad?Hal: It's Thursday! Just come down from wherever you are!Dewey: Of all the days you could've picked, you chose this Thursday. Anything interesting about Thursday, Dad?Hal: Will you stop this?!Dewey: Anything at all you could think of that might be happening this Thursday?Hal: Okay, Dewey, what is the big deal about Thursday?Dewey: [echoing] It's. My. Birthday.[The listening crowd is shocked in disgust]Hal: It is not your... [counts the days on his hand and realizes Dewey is right] Oh, God!Dewey: Well, ladies and gentlemen, that's the story of a little boy who lost his birthday. If you have any thoughts or comments, my dad would love to hear them.

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