Aqua Teen Hunger Force, Aqua Something You Know Whatever (season 9)

Carl:
Smithed from iron ore. Crafted from liquid magma by one of the three demons. Satan's slaves. In the mine of a volcano.

Master Shake:
Volcanoes have minds?!

Carl:
Some do, yeah

Master Shake:
I had no idea volcanoes were self aware

Carl:
This one was. Look, uh, don't interrupt. I'm losin' momentum here.

Master Shake:
Okay

Carl:
Anyway, demon one, his name was...uh, Uno. And his brothers was named Yahtzee and Boggle. They was selected to guard this shirt with their lives, from me.

Master Shake:
You were alive...back then?

Carl:
I was. Yes, I was

Master Shake:
I thought you were, like, in your forties

Carl:
Forty thousand......million

Master Shake:
Damn son

Carl:
Look, let's go with this. No-no interruptions, please

Master Shake:
Right on, man

Carl:
You know at that time, th-there wasn't no such thing as a shirt, you know. We barely had enough mammoth fur to cover our junk, but we liked it that way. 'Cause it allowed me to showcase my lads n' my traps. And plus, the women, I mean, seriously. It's like they're all strippers.

Master Shake:
Strippers everywhere?

Carl:
Yeah. And plus, uh, dragons too

Master Shake:
Dragon strippers? Holy smokes!

Carl:
I know, right? I saw that shirt. I say, "I want that!" I rode up the volcano on my, uh...you know, mythical...it was, uh...you know wh-

Master Shake:
One-eyed Wonder Worm!

Carl:
That-yeah, that's what I was riding

Master Shake:
I've heard you talk about it before!

Carl:
So Yahtzee looks up and he comes at me with a bass solo. Oh man, shouldn't-a done that, 'cause I ripped the ax from his clawed fingers and I swiftly beheaded him. All this, and I still continued to bass solo! From, uh...is it, like a Geddy Lee deep cut. Moving Pictures, maybe it was YYZ, I don't know. I didn't miss a note, I know that. Boggle looks up at me from his drum kit and he goes, "You don't kill my brother". He says something cooler than that; that was the gist of it. Yeah, he regretted the day I come to the Interplanetary Insanitarium. So then Uno sees this, right? And he aims all his amps at me and he tries to bring the thunder. But I got earplugs in, and it ain't no match for me. I got my junk ready, full-on, in chub mode, and reflects the thunder back at him. And it explodes his face and it melts it off. So I wore this shirt and I ruled the Interplanetary Insanitarium for a thousand years like a god. My name: The Gorn Lord.

Master Shake:
So this is you on this shirt

Carl:
I lost a little up top since then. My point is a thousand years have passed. And I must pass this shirt down to a new warrior king. A new Gorn Lord who will rule the kingdom of Hair Metal Mountain, as a Mighty God...of Rock!