Auf Wiedersehen, Pet, Series 2

Barry:
[Coming up from the basement] Is that you, Hazel?

Wayne:
Barry?

Barry:
Wayne?

Trevor:
Nearly gave me a heart attack!

Wayne:
[Enters the living room and unmasks himself] Hello, my son.

Barry:
Hello, Wayne!

Wayne:
Gimme five, trade some skin! [They give each other a low five]

Barry:
Ahh, watching the basketball on Channel 4, have we?

Trevor:
I thought it was The Muppets...

Barry:
Always seemed a bit strange to me, all those seven-foot American Negroes playin' for Milton Keynes!

Wayne:
[Pointing to Trevor] I hope this isn't Hazel. I hope you ain't changed that much, son.

Barry:
Nah, nah, this is Trev. Cor, Trev, this is Wayne!

Wayne:
Sorry to startle you, son. It was meant for him [Barry]. So where's the lads, then?

Barry:
They're, um... [Quietly] ...not all here.

Wayne:
Hold on a minute. You wrote to me saying this was gonna be the big reunion, class of '82.

Barry:
I wrote to all of you, didn't I, Trev?

Trevor:
Aye, I posted them at the post office.

Wayne:
Well that's one up on the ol' laundrette, ain't it, eh?

Barry:
Bomber's coming... maybe.

Wayne:
What about the others?

Barry:
I haven't heard from 'em yet.

Trevor:
Well, at least you've got each other. The Magnificent Two(!)

Barry:
Trevor! Trevor, don't you have to pick up those breeze blocks? [Trevor throws his trowel into his cement mix and storms off. Barry makes a space for Wayne to sit down. Wayne has a glance at the picture of the Magnificent Seven before taking a seat.]

Wayne:
So, how are you then?

Barry:
Ahh, bostin', like.

Wayne:
I drove all the way...

Barry:
[Overlapping with Wayne] Did you...? [Gestures to Wayne to continue]

Wayne:
I was just gonna say, I drove all the way from Tilbury, 'cos you said we was gonna have a bit of a knees-up.

Barry:
Yeah. Well, it's not easy, Wayne, getting you lot together. There's a bit of gypsy in the soul of all of you, mate. I mean, Moxey's always lived at no fixed abode, me letter to Oz was returned, "Not known at this address". [Picks up the envelope and shows it to Wayne] Look. That's from his wife.

Wayne:
Well, what about Dennis and Nev? I mean, they ain't gadabouts, are they?

Barry:
I must admit, Wayne, I'm very disappointed in those two. I thought my letter at least justified the courtest of a reply.

Wayne:
So it's just us two, is it?

Barry:
Well, it's a bit of a letdown. If I were you, I'd naff off back to Tilbury...

Wayne:
All right! All right, I just flamin' got 'ere, didn't I?