Auf Wiedersehen, Pet, Series 2

Bomber:
I found this, Wayne. Should take the chill off the room.

Wayne:
You'd need a bloody blowlamp to take the chill out of the atmosphere, though, wouldn't you?

Bomber:
[Setting the rug down] 'Tis true you wouldn't win any popularity contest at the moment.

Wayne:
[Moving a chair and some throws] Look, if I'd known old Arthur was going to reach that badly, I'd have thought twice about strumpin' his daughter, wouldn't I?

Bomber:
Yes, and having had those thought, you'd still have gone and done it. [Starts laying the rug as Wayne sweeps the debris from its path] Knob law, that's what you're ruled by, Wayne. As soon as there's a fire in your loins, there's a freeze-up in your brain.

Wayne:
Yeah, but normally it's only me that suffers, ain't it? Grazed knee from shinning a few drainpipes, the odd pulled muscle from doin' it to the old Bolero at 45 instead of 33. [Bomber looks up, still mad at Wayne] Yeah... Look, I might have dropped me mates in it 'cos I couldn't say no to an afternoon of passion, but she wasn't 'alf worth it.

Bomber:
Well that's some consolation to us, Wayne(!) [Gets up] Right... while you finish your jankers, I'll have a scout around, see if I can't find some mattreses and cushions. [Leaves the room...then pokes his head around the door] You'd better decide which one of the twenty-two bedrooms you're gonna lock yourself in!