Auf Wiedersehen, Pet, Series 2

Oz:
Mind that snake there, Moxey.

Moxey:
Where? Where?! [Drops the sandwiches onto the ground.]

Oz:
Ho-ho! So much for special undercover agent Mulcackey, eh? Falls at the first fence, doesn't he?

Moxey:
[Picking up the sandwiches] It was hardly a fair test, Oz! Anyone would react to a snake warning, no matter what his name was.

Neville:
Ah, it's only what the police'll do, though, Brendan. You can't expect them to write you a letter tellin' you when they're comin' to see you.

Moxey:
I know, I know. I'll just have to concentrate a lot harder. Anyone want a butty? These are ham. [Bomber grabs one.]

Barry:
I'll have cheese and chutney. [Neville grabs one of the sandwiches on the chair. Wayne come up to get a sandwich from Moxey, who turns away from Wayne.]

Neville:
[Grabbing the last sandwich from the tub] Not you! [Wayne turns to the chair.]

Barry:
[Grabbing a sandwich from the chair] Thank you!

Wayne:
[Taking the last sandwich from the chair] Oh, I see. Gonna be like that, is it, eh?

Bomber:
Sorry, Wayne. You can't expect any consideration from us when you show none in return!

Barry:
Who is this Brendan... Mulcahy anyway?

Moxey:
It's Mulachy, Barry.

Barry:
No, it's not. It's Mulcahy. It's the name on the papers.

Moxey:
Yeah, I know. I can't pronounce that, though.

Barry:
What's the point of havin' it as a false name, then?

Moxey:
I didn't have any choice in the matter, y'know. I didn't go to Rent-a-Name. It was an alehouse in Kilburn. I could hardly call meself F-F-Fitzherbert C-Carruthers!

Barry:
Well, it's just as well. You can't pronounce that either, can you? Who is Brendan Mulcahy anyway? I mean, does he exist, or is he just a creation?

Oz:
He's probably a dead man.

Wayne:
And I know how he feels.

Oz:
See, what happens is, one Mick snuffs it over there in potato land, an' his family flog his passport an' that to another Mick so he can come over here an' work, y'know.

Bomber:
That's not all he might get up to either.

Neville:
What? D'you mean the IRA, Bomber?

Oz:
IRA bomber's right. You might find the anti-terrorist squad on yer tail, Brendan, as well as yer ordinary plods!

Moxey:
You're really reassuring you are, Oz(!)