Auf Wiedersehen, Pet, Series 2

Barry:
The food doesn't seem so good tonight, does it, Wayne?

Wayne:
There's no difference in the food, son. It's the mood that's down the crapper.

Oz:
Well, it's got to be said... [Burps] ...this latest development with this Martin gadgy, I mean it's took the shine off the trip to Spain to everybody, hann'it?

Neville:
Of all the blokes in Newcastle, you had to pick on him.

Oz:
What?!

Dennis:
He picks on a lot of people, Nev. So the odds aren't that outlandish!

Oz:
Hold on a minute, hang on, it wasn't me who started that barney, it was that Martin gadgy, man, wann' it?

Wayne:
Hey, hey, if you remember, the incident occured because you tried to get into his old lady's knickers.

Oz:
Oh, hey, hold on! I don't think you're one to point the finger aboot that, do you, eh? We've been dropped in the clarts plenty of times by your rampant member, haven't we?

Wayne:
They never forget, do they?

Bomber:
C'mon, lads. Fair's fair. That Martin's a born headbanger. And I can't say I fancy working alongside him.