Brooklyn Nine-Nine, Season 1

Boyle:
You talking oldest bags? 68.

Santiago:
That's not that old.

Boyle:
Yeah, but I was only 20.

Jake:
20? Were you even a cop then?

Boyle:
No, man. That was before I made it into the academy.

[Everyone is confused for a moment, then Diaz smiles as the penny drops]

Diaz:
Charles isn't talking about his oldest arrest.

Diaz, Jake, Santiago:
Ew!

Boyle:
Yeah, 68, like I said.

Jake:
God, you had sex with a 68-year-old when you were in your 20s?

Boyle:
You know how it is, when you have a chance to bed an older woman, you-

Jake:
No, that's not an older woman; that's an old woman! That's someone's grandma!

Boyle:
She was, actually; that's how I met her.

Santiago:
Oh! [Everyone grimaces and starts laughing]

Boyle:
Don't- don't knock it 'till you try it! She had a replacement hip with some serious torque. It was like having sex with a Transformer!

Jake:
That is no one's fantasy!