House, Season 3

Dr. Wilson:
Why steal my pad?

Dr. House:
[mockingly] Oh my God! You're right! I'm an addict, thanks for opening my eyes.

Dr. Wilson:
No, I mean why my pad. Foreman, Cameron, and Chase's pads are just as convenient, but their association with you is involuntary. They're employees. I associate with you through choice, and any relationship that involves choice, you have to see how far you can push before it breaks.

Dr. House:
This is easy. You ask the questions, answer them, and make tasty snacks. Let's go try the casino.

Dr. Wilson:
And one day our friendship will break, and that will just prove your theory that relationships are conditional, and you don't need human connection or deserve it or whatever goes on in that rat-maze of your brain.

Dr. House:
[to patient] Sorry, if I had known he was going to be this annoying, I would have stolen Dr. Cameron's pad and Dr. Foreman's car. At least she appreciates my brooding melancholy.

Dr. House:
[cellphone rings, he answers] House's house of whining, state your complaint!