Married... with Children, Season 8

Coleman:
Hi, I'm the building code inspector. Are you the one that called?

Al:
I am. (blinks, then points): Aren't you...

Coleman:
No! Don't even ask. I'm not him. I've never been him. I can't even stand the little creep. (as he walks in the Bundy house): Now, I understand you wanted to report an illegal driveway.

Al:
Yes, I did, Inspector. (points outside): That one right out there. If you look carefully, you can see that it's built nowhere near code. I know, because I built it myself out of ground-up women's shoes. How much is the fine?

Coleman (cheerfully):
Well, since you turned yourself in, I think I'll let it go at $100.

Al:
I see, and what if I said I built it that way just to make you look like an idiot?

Coleman (slightly offended):
Then that would be $1500.

Bud:
And what if we called you a moron to boot?

Coleman (getting madder):
$2000.

Kelly:
Are you sure you're not Gary Coleman from Diff'rnt Strokes?

Coleman:
No, I am not.

Kelly:
Good. I hated that show.

Coleman (angrily):
$5000! (tears off the citation and hands it to Al, who raises his hands)

Al:
Don't give it to me. It's not my driveway. It belongs to those people right next door, but they might not let you in, because the only black person they respect is Ted Danson.

Coleman (glares at Al):
Whatchu talkin' about, Bundy? (realizes he outed himself with his catchphrase): Aw, hell! Now I gotta fine myself!