Monty Python's Flying Circus, Series 2

Interviewer:
Was there anything unusual about Dinsdale?

Gloria:
Certainly not! He was perfectly normal in every way! Except inasmuch as he thought he was being followed by a giant hedgehog named Spiny Norman.

Interviewer:
How big was Norman supposed to be?

Gloria:
Normally he was wont to be about twelve feet from nose to tail, but when Dinsdale was very depressed Norman could be anything up to eight hundred yards long. When Norman was about, Dinsdale would go very quiet and his nose would swell up and his teeth would start moving about and he'd become very violent and claim that he'd laid Stanley Baldwin. Dinsdale was a gentleman. And what's more he knew how to treat a female impersonator.