Red vs. Blue, Season 4

Sarge:
What's all this ruckus?

Donut:
There's an enemy trying to get into the base.

Sarge:
Where?

Donut:
Right there.

Sarge:
Where? Behind Simmons?

Simmons:
He means me sir.

Donut:
Oh, Simmons, Why didn't you tell me it was you?

Simmons:
Donut, I did tell you it was me.

Donut:
Well you didn't say it was you, you just kept saying "I'm me".

Simmons:
That's because I am me.

Donut:
But you didn't say you were you. If you had said you were you instead of "I'm me", I would have known you were you. You just kept saying you were me.

Simmons:
That's because I'm me.

Grif:
And thus ends another meeting of the pronoun club. Same time next week everybody.

Simmons:
Well now that we have that straightened out, I have some important information.

Sarge:
I don't want to hear it, Blue.

Simmons:
What, this is valuable information about the war.

Sarge:
There is no such thing as valuable information, from a traitor!

Simmons:
But sir, I only did that because no one would believe me about the tank.

Donut:
Sarge, Simmons has issues with his father that he displaces on you.

Simmons:
No Donut, that's why I punched Sarge in the face. I left the base because I wasn't fulfilling my undying need to please other people.

Sarge:
Alright, enough! The next person who tells me about Simmons' feelings is getting court-martialled

Grif:
Simmons likes to go in the bathroom and cry while he punches the mirror... Well, I'll go pack my bags. Nice working with you guys. Good luck with the Blues. It's been real.