Robot Chicken, Season 1

Announcer:
Blackula versus Blackenstein Versus the Black Mummy will not be seen tonight, so that we may bring you the following program.

["You Can't Do That On Robot Chicken!" parodies the Canadian Comedy show "You Can't Do That On Television!". Scene changes to colorful lockers]

Seth Green:
[pops out of the locker] Hey, Sarah.

Sarah Michelle Gellar:
[pops out of another locker] Yeah, Seth?

Seth Green:
Hey, did I ever tell you about my cousin? She eats nothing but pancakes.

Sarah Michelle Gellar:
Wow. Is she overweight?

Seth Green:
Are you kidding? She's stacked!

[The audience laugh as Seth and Sarah popped back inside the lockers. Then the Mad Scientist and Robot Chicken popped out of the lockers, and held up signs. The Mad Scientist's sign says "Hey, Robot Chicken!". Robot Chicken's sign says "Bawk?" as in "What?". The Mad Scientist's other sign says "Why did the chicken cross the road?". Robot Chicken's sign still says "Bawk?" as in "I don't know.". Then the Mad Scientist's last sign says "To die in the name of science!", before grabbing the chainsaw and chases after Robot Chicken out of the lockers as the audience laugh]

Chinese Restaurant Guy:
[pops out of another locker] Hey, Breckin Meyer!

Breckin Meyer:
[pops out of another locker] Yeah, Chinese restaurant guy?

Chinese Restaurant Guy:
Yeah, yeah. You ever see a cat-gopher?

Breckin Meyer:
Cat-gopher? What's a cat-gopher?

Chinese Restaurant Guy:
Cat go for $6.00 if I put enough MSG on it. [pops back inside the locker]

[The audience laugh]

Breckin Meyer:
Ha ha! Seriously, is this the only part of the sketch I'm in? [steps out of the locker] I just spent an hour and fifteen minutes in traffic getting here. Granted, it's in a Benz, but this is horse[bleep]! Oh, [bleep] you! You know what? I'm going home, okay? You can kiss my ass. [leaves] I was in Garfield, mother[bleep]!

[We cut to the firing squad sketch where the Bloopers Host is chained up by El Capitano]

El Capitano:
Soon you will be free.

Bloopers Host:
Blue skies! Barthy burgers! Girls!

El Capitano:
I meant soon you will be free to watch our movies on demand service.

Bloopers Host:
That's still pretty good.

El Capitano:
Unfortunately, the only movie we have on demand is Christmas with the Kranks.

Bloopers Host:
Nooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[We cut to Barth's Burgers sketch where Barth gave Macaulay Culkin and Mila Kunis plates of ugly, disgusting burgers]

Mila Kunis:
Mac, you know I'm a vegetarian.

Macaulay Culkin:
Mila, this is Barth's. The only real meat here is in the cockroaches.

Barth:
I heard that! [squashed the cockroach flat]

[Mila threw up, followed by Macaulay, and finally Barth. Then the dog licks vomit]

Macaulay Culkin:
Now, that's comedy.

[We cut to Seth Green in front of the orange round couch]

Seth Green:
Please welcome our special guest tonight, Vice President of Adult Swim, Keith Crofford.

Keith Crofford:
[walks over and shake Seth's hand] Thanks, Seth. [sits down along with Seth] I just wanted to say that y'all are doing a really good job on Robot Chicken.

Seth Green:
That's great! So, when are we getting renewed for another season?

Keith Crofford:
Uh, I don't know. [now showered with green slime. The studio audience laughs. Crofford stands up, wiping slime from his eyes] Hahaha. You're cancelled.

[Seth is shocked and stares angrily at the camera]