SpongeBob SquarePants, Season 2

Robot Krabs:
Okay, now let's hear that formula.

SpongeBob:
Sorry, no can do, Mr. Krabs.

Robot Krabs:
[his eyes are now on fire] WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!

Plankton:
But we did everything you said-- I followed all the rules! I even ate 105 black licorice jellybeans through a straw! [holds up a straw]

Robot Krabs:
Now why can't you tell me the formula?

SpongeBob:
It's your rule: never speak the formula. You told me to keep it in [holds up a bottle with the secret formula in it] ...this bottle. [Robot Krabs' eyes open widely with a "ding!" sound effect]

Plankton:
This is it, Plankton. [pushes a lever] Gently now... [he continues to push the lever, getting overly excited as he gets closer. The penny that Mr. Krabs was chasing earlier rolls under the door, then Mr. Krabs rushes in and everyone in the kitchen gasps, including the guy on the penny]

Mr. Krabs:
[gasps]

SpongeBob:
[gasps]

Guy on the Penny:
[gasps]

Robot Krabs:
Gasp!

Mr. Krabs:
How could you do this, SpongeBob? Givin' me secret formuler to this...imposter?!

Robot Krabs:
Don't listen to him, SpongeBob. Remember: ravioli, ravioli, give me the formuloli.

Mr. Krabs:
SpongeBob, no! don't listen to him! I'm the real Mr. Krabs!

Robot Krabs:
Don't listen to him. He's obviously a robot. [exhaust pipe smokes]

Mr. Krabs:
Well, if I was a robot, which I'm not, at least I'm well-put together, not some rusted-out, steam-driven pile of junk!

Robot Krabs:
Who are you callin' steam-driven...?

SpongeBob:
[yelling in frustration] QUIET!! Until I know who the real Mr. Krabs is, nobody moves, [holds a hose attached to a tartar sauce machine] nobody gets hurt.

Mr. Krabs and Robot Krabs:
Tartar sauce?!

Mr. Krabs:
Take it easy with that thing, son.

SpongeBob:
[squirts some tartar sauce, causing Mr. Krabs to jump into robot Krabs' arms] I'll do the talking around here. I think I'll ask you two a couple of questions; questions only the real Mr. Krabs could answer.

Mr. Krabs:
[smiles while Robot Krabs looks worried] Okay, then.

SpongeBob:
First question: what time does the Krusty Krab open?

Robot Krabs:
[beats Mr. Krabs to it] 9:30 A.M.

SpongeBob:
Right. [to Mr. Krabs] That's one strike, Mr. Fake.

Mr. Krabs:
But--

SpongeBob:
Nuh-uh-uh! I'm running this quiz show, I'll ask the questions. If there's gonna be any 'buts', they're gonna be from me. [while rubbing the hose nozzle] Okay, now, question two: how much does a Krabby Patty cost?

Mr. Krabs:
$2.99!

SpongeBob:
On Wednesday...

Robot Krabs:
99 cents.

SpongeBob:
Right again! [to Mr. Krabs] You're starting to look pretty phoney right about now. I'd be nervous if I were you. Now, only the really real Mr. Krabs could answer this- if we're discussing the secret formula on the third Wednesday in January and it's not raining outside after we've gargled with vanilla pudding, what do we do?

Mr. Krabs:
That's an easy one. You just...just.. let's see...if it's... uh... if it's January... with... with vanilla pudding... you... uh... pass? [gets shot with tartar sauce]