SpongeBob SquarePants, Season 3

SpongeBob SquarePants is an American animated television series that airs on Nickelodeon. The show follows the adventures of the title character and his various friends in the underwater city, and being pursued by the evil Plankton. It spawned a mov… more »

[Two puppets appear on the TV screen]

Puppet 1:
Hey, where you going?

Puppet 2:
To my job.

Puppet 1:
You have a job?

Puppet 2:
Why wouldn't I? I'm not some lazy inconsiderate jerk who lays in bed all day.

Puppet 1:
Say, where can I get one of these jobs?

[The camera pans down to reveal that it's SpongeBob handling the puppets behind the TV screen]

SpongeBob:
[voicing puppet 2] Oh, they're everywhere, especially if you're green and have six tentacles. [voicing puppet 1] Thanks. I'm gonna go look for one, so I can stop [normal voice] MOOCHING OFF MY FRIENDS, and they can get back to their lives!

Squidward:
This isn't my show! SpongeBob, the remote control's broken! Get over here and fix it!

SpongeBob:
[completely had it; flips the TV away] I've got a better idea! Why don't I call someone whose job it is to fix it?! You know why? Because when I need a job done, I get someone with a JOB to DO THAT JOB!

Squidward:
[pause] What're you saying?

[SpongeBob loses it, and takes Squidward, still in bed, bursts out of his house, and runs to the Krusty Krab, screaming]

Mr. Krabs:
[talking on the phone] Donate to the children's fund? Why? What have children ever done for me?

[SpongeBob suddenly appears, as he furiously grabs the phone and throws it away]

SpongeBob:
You want your dime back?! [takes one out] TAKE IT! Now Squidward can come back, right?!

Mr. Krabs:
[checks the dime through a telescope] Wrong! [throws the dime at SpongeBob's face] That ain't my first dime.

SpongeBob:
[throws out more dimes at Mr. Krabs' face] Then have some more dimes! I've got plenty of 'em!

Mr. Krabs:
You can't put a price on me first dime! And I can't forgive that thievin' bilge rat Squidward for stealin' it!

[SpongeBob suddenly grabs Mr. Krabs by the throat and holding him up in the air]

SpongeBob:
LISTEN, YOU CRUSTACEOUS CHEAPSKATE! SQUIDWARD HAS BEEN LIVING IN MY HOUSE DRIVING ME CRAZY! [shakes him violently] AND YOU'RE NOT GONNA HIRE HIM BACK ALL BECAUSE OF A STUPID DIME?! [a prehistoric dime falls out of Mr. Krabs' back pocket. SpongeBob suddenly calms down and lets go of Mr. Krabs] What's that?

Mr. Krabs:
[gasps] Me first dime! [hugs the dime] Oh, Dimey, I'll never lose you again!

SpongeBob:
This is a dime?

Mr. Krabs:
I've been in business a long time, boy.

SpongeBob:
So, if Squidward never stole the dime, he can come back to work, right?'

Mr. Krabs:
Aye, lad, just let the dime and me have our privacy. [kisses the dime. SpongeBob cheers before running off]

SpongeBob:
Yeeee-aah-hoooo!

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Submitted by wikidude on June 03, 2024

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