That '70s Show, Season 1

[The guys have been talking about women and their physical features, but whenever Red and Kitty walk by, they switch to talking about the Bible.]

Eric:
Hey Kelso, quick question. Why can't you date someone a little less annoying?

Kelso:
Like who?

Eric:
What about Barbara Vanson?

Kelso:
Nah, she's just as annoying as Jackie.

Hyde:
Yeah, but her boobs are huge.

Kelso:
So?

Hyde:
[opens up Playboy] Do you find that annoying?

Kelso:
[laughs] ...Pam Macey! Now she's got some knockers, baby!

Hyde:
True, but they're not bigger than Barbara's.

Kelso:
Yeah they are.

Eric:
You're dreaming. It's like comparing... [Red walks in] Exodus and Deuteronomy, both of which have taught us very valuable lessons.

Red:
Damn dryer's broke. Aw, nuts. I need my vicegrips. [the guys wait until Red leaves]

Kelso:
Have you seen Pam in a tube top? It's like looking into the Grand Tetons. In a tube top!

Hyde:
Look, the issue isn't, "Are Pam's big?" Right. The issue is, "Are they bigger than Barbara's?" Because Barbara's are bigger than... [Kitty walks in] the walls of Jericho, which as we all know came tumbling down, right?! ...Hello, Mrs. Forman.

Kitty:
Hi. Eric, did your father come down here?

Eric:
Yeah, he's fixing the dryer.

Kitty:
Oh, dear. You know, ever since the plant cut back his hours, he's spent all his time fixing things. Things that don't need fixing! Things I need, things I use, things I love. I gotta go hide the crockpot. [the guys wait until Kitty leaves]

Hyde:
Sounds like your dad is losing it.

Kelso:
Geez, if [Red]'s like this now, he's going to be a total headcase when they shut down the plant. He's just going to be this pathetic guy...[Red walks in; loudly]...with breasts the size of watermelons! [pauses] ...Is what Moses said to the Egyptians.

Red:
Kelso, go home.