The Inbetweeners, Series 3

Mr Cooper:
You lot seem awfully quiet tonight.

Simon:
Yeah, well, it's better than listening to non-stop bullshit!

Mr Cooper:
What's that on your head, Simon?

Simon:
(Sarcastically) Oh, I dunno, Dad! Oh yeah, it's a hat?! God!

Mr Cooper:
Looks bloody stupid.

Will:
We tried to tell him.

Mr Cooper:
You look like a butcher.

Simon:
Pete Doherty wears them actually!

Mr Cooper:
Pete Doherty's butcher wears them.

Simon:
Oh, sorry, I forgot you're a comedian as well as a cab driver!

Mr Cooper:
OI! Why are you wearing that anyway?

Neil:
He's meeting a bird.

Mr Cooper:
KNEW IT! You've got that look in your eye. He gets it when he's watching The X Factor.

Jay:
What, when he sees Louis Walsh?

Mr Cooper:
No, thankfully Cheryl Cole. If his mom walks in he has to pop a pillow over his lap.