King of the Hill, Season 2

Hank:
It says here I owe $40 and that can't be true. I always bring back my tapes. Look for yourself, I've returned The Great Santini 23 times.

Store Clerk:
Okay, Hank Hill, June 23rd. Yeah, you rented and never returned Cuffs & Collars.

Hank:
I've never even heard of that. Have you?

Peggy:
Nuh-uh. Unless it's got the name Merchant, Ivory, or Billy Crystal above the title. I am not interested.

Bobby:
Wait a minute. Wait a minute. They're buying me a movie for my birthday. That's why we're here, right?

Luanne:
Really, Bobby. They haven't said anything.

Hank:
Bobby, you ever heard of a movie called Cuffs & Collars?

Bobby:
Ooh, I think that's the one with the two cops who don't get along, but then they do, but it's too late, cause he's dead, but not really.

Hank:
So you've seen it?

Bobby:
No.

Hank:
How about you, Luanne.

Luanne:
(nods no)

Bobby:
Oh no. You're not getting a movie, Bobby (laughs). You are so smooth.

Hank:
No, we didn't rent it. So if you could please erase the $40 and penalize yourself whatever you think is fair, we'll be on our way.

Store Clerk:
I am sorry, but the computer won't let me erase anything until you either return the tape or pay the $40.

Hank:
I told you I didn't rent the tape, now who is calling me a liar, you or the machine? 'Cause I wanna know whose ass to kick!

Store Clerk:
I'm not calling you a liar, sir.

Hank:
Fine. Now where's the ass on this thing?

Peggy:
(sighs) I need a dryer, Hank. Just pay for the tape.

Hank:
Absolutely not. I won't pay for someone else's screw up. Hell, I wouldn't be surprised if that tape was sitting on the shelf right now. Where would Cuff's & Collars be, Action Adventure, Action Comedy, Action Action?

Store Clerk:
Make a left.

Hank:
Okay. (realizes he's in the adult section and he rushes out) BWAHHHHH!